Sunday, July 29, 2007

Weekend update

I haven't stitched in well over a week. Family business and a new volunteer op has come up.

But, tonight I did stitch some of my PM. I can only stitch for about an hour before my count is off. So in the hour that I stitched tonight I only managed to get about 2 or 3 rows done. Is that not sick or what? I would really like to accomplish more. Perhaps, since it is 2 am here at home and since I cannot sleep because I am worrying so much, I think I will go work on that some more and perhaps try to sleep a little. Sound like a plan?

It is very frustrating. If for people who don't know that may be peeking at my work, I have bipolar disorder. Things were going relatively easy for a bit untill Wed of last week. It was hell for almost 3 days. Today is the first day I feel like a human being. However, there is much work I need to do to be able to communicate with others so as not to cause problems. I CAN DO IT! I learned that I can do it. It is so cool to know that I CAN rise above the challenges of this disease. However, in cases like the last few days it was sheer hell to work out of it. I stayed in bed for forever. I didn't want to get out into the real world so as not to damage myself or other people. I just wanted to control my emotions by hiding them away. I wanted to protect my family and the rest of the world from the monster within me.

Anyway, I am a little better. I just cannot sleep. I have to seriously review my previous year's therapy treatment. I need to set up a plan to use. Some people call it WRAP wellness recovery action plan. My goal is to use WRAP, DBT and CBT customized to my own needs and challenges to come up with an overall plan to work with. That takes work. I need to investigate each to figure out what works best. Then, I will have to use paper documentation to keep track of everything. Maybe I can use this computer for it. We shall see. I know I will need Excel to track mood charting. I will need Word to set up templates. I will start there.

Sorry I rambled on about other issues. I will try to stick to stitching only next time. Maybe I can post pics of the 3 rows I did. Wowee. Whatever.

1 comment:

Mary said...

It is your blog and you can put anything you want. I'm happy for you that you were able to overcome alot of the hard part of this episode so quickly. You did great stitching what you did. I'm not getting much done when I stitch either but at least I'm doing it. I hope you will get some rest soon.